Carbonated Queen
by tidesandtrees
Summary: Rey is the best fiancée and Ben can't wait for her to move in with him. What he isn't looking forward to, however, is her tendency to let used cups and soda cans pile up in her bedroom. Rey can't help herself though - she needs her soda for good reason.


"You know that's gotta stop once you're all moved in."

She didn't need to look at him to feel the blaring judgment he was shoving her way.

"What?" Rey burped and laughed.

"That." Ben pointed at the aluminum can in Rey's hand. "The midnight snacking and the graveyard that follows it."

"What a misnomer. I wouldn't call my heavy need for nightly hydration 'snacking'," she argued. Rey set her can of ginger ale down on her nightstand but misjudged the free space. A tinny orchestra of sounds alarmed them both. She shot a huge grin Ben's way before trying to discreetly clean up the mess of soda cans that had tumbled to the floor.

"Hydration? That's what you're going with? Keep a glass of water by you then. Or better yet, a reusable water bottle."

"Look. You say potato, I say carbonated queen."

Ben rolled over on his side. "Fine. Fill yourself with all the high fructose corn syrup you want. But just don't bring it into our bedroom! Or else I'm giving all the ants and rodents your name and photo when they come asking for second helpings."

* * *

Ben collapsed back onto the bed. Covered in satisfaction and Rey, he tried to stay awake before his fiance returned from her postcoital bathroom visit. He felt his eyes growing heavier with every second. When she came back to the shadowy room, she laid a kiss on his lips.

"Rey."

"Yes, my love?"

"Did you grab a soda after the bathroom?"

"Um..."

"I could taste the root beer on your tongue."

"I can't help it, Ben! I get really thirsty at night! I promise I'll return it to the kitchen straight away tomorrow morning."

"You better," he grumbled.

"I promise, old man." She kissed his shoulder before finishing off her drink.

* * *

"Rey, you've been so good lately. Please tell me you're not returning to bad habits during the coldest month of the year. Ants, mice, and rats all magically appear in droves during the cold months."

"I mean, I would want to find a warm house during the cold months, too."

Ben was not amused.

"I'm just saying I understand. It's pretty much the reason why I'm prepping ahead of time for my night-time drink. Because I would hate to get the urge and then leave the warmth of the bed. This way, I get to stay warm and enjoy my little treat."

She placed the can down. "I'm not even going to drink it, for sure. It's just a precaution."

Ben maintained his stony gaze despite her fluttering lashes.

* * *

She slid her arms around his torso and began to rub up and down his chest.

"Mmmm, what time is it?" he asked her.

"I think two?" she whispered, her hands wandering further down his body.

"And what did I do to deserve this middle of the night attention?"

"I woke up and thought about how being married will mean I get to have you whenever I want."

"Funny. I've thought the same thing." He rolled over and slid toward the foot of the bed.

He looked up at her. "Thank goodness I asked you to marry me, right?"

"Shut up," Rey ordered, pushing his teasing eyes and smirk back down.

* * *

_Ssssst._

"Wow. How convenient that you had that prepped from earlier."

"I told you, I wanted to make sure I had it just in case." She sighed after a sip of Diet Coke.

"In case you were ravenous after a night of love-making?"

"Don't quote The Office on me. I showed you that show."

"She doth protest too much."

"Ugh, and now you've gone all Shakespeare on me."

"Admit it, sweetheart. You knew you wanted to seduce me tonight and wanted to have a drink at the ready. To quench your thirst after...well...quenching your thirst."

"You're annoying."

"All I hear is that I'm right."

She smacked him with her pillow. "Go to sleep. And let me finish my post-sex drink in peace."

* * *

"Oh, I almost forgot. I have a present for you."

"Ben, I know we just had a massive wedding - no thanks to your mom - and you must be tired. I know I am. But you do realize we had a shitload of people give us gifts? You didn't need to get me anything."

"Oh, I know. But I wanted to. Just come and open it."

He pulled his new bride toward their bedroom and turned her to face the corner that used to hold her nightstand. He'd clearly switched it out with another object that was now covered with a large black cloth and a big red bow.

"Go on. Open it," he urged.

She walked over and imitated a magician's assistant. With a wink at Ben, she lifted the fabric to reveal his gift.

"A mini-fridge?" She pouted her lips in puzzlement.

Ben shrugged. "Look inside."

"A mini-fridge stocked with lots of sodas?"

Her expression changed as soon as she said it. She smiled at him coyly.

"Mr. Solo, whatever happened to your worry concerning the rodents and ants?"

"Mrs. Solo, I think I can overlook some pesky critters if it means my wife will happily engage in certain activities with me. More specifically, the ones that normally preempt the soda cravings."

She pulled his mouth to hers and fisted his hair. Coming up for air, she pushed Ben backward into the bed. "Well, that's very understanding of you. In fact, I think I feel a craving coming on right now."

_**A/N: This was a silly little ficlet inspired by this Kermit the Frog "tea" meme that reads: "Do my parents realize I could be out doing drugs & being a hoe but nope I'm a terrible person because I leave cups in my room." Couldn't NOT write it after cracking myself up over the thought of Ben getting mad at Rey for leaving used cups/cans in their room.**_


End file.
